Communication & Customer Complaints

We talked last time about the importance of communication as interaction and not just giving out information. I spoke about the need for our business communication to make an impact, rather than just talking/hearing. Nowhere is this more true than when dealing with our customers/clients. Allow me to share two personal examples.

I recently complained to a company, using their web site form. I admit to being miffed, but I wasn’t hateful or harsh. The reply I got back had two sentences. The first one told me my complaint was invalid (in those words); the abundance of customers who used this service was cited as proof of my mistaken protest. The second sentence corrected a misspelled word in my original complaint and informed that I had a better chance of being taken seriously if I could spell.

Trust me, this “business communication” had an impact on me. FLASH RED!!!! I was certain this business owner would be shocked at such horrible customer service, so I called the office and was able to speak with the Marketing Manager. I explained the situation and he was sympathetic. I asked to speak with the owner. He hesitated, so I pressed. I learned that the response to my complaint had come from the owner (!!!).

It’s not my intention to use the entire post to merely rant about this unfortunate experience (though I do enjoy that perk), but it does illustrate a point: what we say/write can impact and change a person…which is our current theme/topic. This should always be kept in mind when dealing with our customers/clients.

Trust me, this response certainly changed me. I was upset when I wrote the complaint, but now I was livid. In those two sentences, I learned all I needed to know about that company. On a couple of occasions, I’ve had the opportunity to tell others about this negative experience. I’m not just not-a-customer, I’m an adversary, actively working to keep other people from using their services. (Do you know how tempted I am even now to actually mention that name of this business?) Was that the intention of this owner? Did she even consider that possibility?

Now, for the flip side. I recently had some difficulty finding a product I use on a regular basis, so I went to the corporate web site and filled out the form, asking for guidance. Several days later, I was informed (“deeply regret”) the product had been discontinued. My loyalty was acknowledged and they let me know how much they appreciate the fact I had taken the time to contact them. In closing, an alternate product was suggested, along with a discount coupon for the new item. (“We value you as a customer”)

Two occasions when a company couldn’t meet my needs. Two responses and two very different outcomes. I’m still buying the alternative product. And, well...you can guess the outccome on the other example.

It’s at the point where a customer comes to us with an issue that our very best communication practices must be exhibited. We want to communicate in such way that brings change—a problem is solved, a complaint is resolved, a concern is addressed, a question is answered. If we handle it badly, we end up changing them into an ex-client. Or worse!

I’m Talking Here!

“I know you think you heard what I said, but I don’t think you understood what I think I meant to say.”

As convoluted as this sounds, it does point out an important principle—good communication involves more than what’s said. It’s also more than what was intended and it’s even more than what’s heard.

Haven’t we all heard a speaker drone on and on, as if the entire goal of the presentation was to be “heard” by the audience or to demonstrate their immense vocabulary? Is that communication?

How many times has management been surprised when a directive sent to the staff didn’t result in instant compliance? Is it bad employees or possibly ineffective communication?

And who of us hasn’t been misunderstood or inadvertently hurt someone’s feelings with an abrupt e-mail? Did we practice good communication?

Communication, by definition, involves more than one person; our word comes from the Latin for common. The goal is (at least) about coming to a common-ness, an understanding. So talking to myself is not communication. ("Yes, it is. No, it’s not!") Talking with no one listening is not communication. And talking without listening is not communication.

Unfortunately, the approach of business communication is too often one-sided: I talk, you listen. (I’m using the verbal idea of communicating, but it also involves written communication.) Business is not accustomed to seeing (utilizing) communication as dialogue, discussion or interaction. The boss wants something done and issues an edict. The company need revenue, so they take out an ad in the local paper. The staff isn’t performing, so we send out a memo. It’s not that any of these are wrong or bad, but they might not be the best way to communicate, if indeed our goal to come to an understanding.

But for most Business Communication, we want an additional aspect. Beyond understanding (i.e., “I get it”), we want our communication to inspire, to educate and to persuade those who hear our message. (i.e., "I want it!") Ultimately, our goal is not just to give out good information but to change those who hear/receive our message—change the way they think, change the way they feel (attitudes) and ultimately, change how they act (behavior). Whether it’s an HR memo to the staff, informing of a new policy or an appeal letter to a potential donor or a speech by the CEO to the Rotary Club, we want it to be more than just the giving out of information without any response. The goal of the message is to become a “change agent.”

Examples: We want those who don’t buy our products to change their buying habit and becme our loyal customers. We want those who are not currently donating to our cause to see the need (or feel the need) and write that check. We want our new employees to embrace our mission and all of our team to comply with our policies.

Because it’s that important, business leaders must know the principles of good communication and practice the proven techniques to make it most effective. (Or bring in an expert to make sure it’s done.) If the message doesn’t bring about understanding and action from those who receive it, we’ve wasted our time in creating it.

I once saw a sign on a post office door that read: “No animals allowed, except seeing eye dogs.” My first question was: Who is that message targeting? The dog certainly can’t read, nor can the blind person using the dog. In my opinion, it was misplaced and vague message. (But it does still make me smile.)

I welcome your comments and your input.
What do you see as a good communication?
Can you share some examples?


In coming posts, I’ll share some of the essentials of good communication and show how they relate to the important role of Business Communication.

Fly-By PR?

We recently saw the incident where President Obama swatted (and killed *GASP!*) a fly during a national television interview. Following the incident, PETA (People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals) used the event to criticize the action…and to promote a non-lethal fly swatter. Here you have a powerful and well-known organization taking on a the President of the United States...over an insect.

PETA issued the following statement: “We support compassion for the even the smallest animals," says Bruce Friedrich, VP for Policy at PETA. “We support giving insects the benefit of the doubt."

Pardon my Bible reference, but talk about straining at a gnat (or in this case, a fly)!

While I don’t always agree with every stance made by PETA, I do respect the “spirit” of their stated mission and their primary goal to prevent cruelty to animal. I also have to give them credit for their proven media savvy—they know how to get their message to the public. With glossy ads, celebrity spokespeople and an unapologetic, aggressive style, they are known for making noise, making themselves heard and making a name for their organization. None of which is necessarily a bad thing. (I mean, that is one of the goals of public relations!)

However, this time, I think their insertion into this fly-swatting incident was unwarranted. (Please note. This is classic armchair PR. Monday-morning coaching, if you can bear the atypical sports analogy) In veering off their primary mission (animals), they’ve become a punch line in late night monologues and a punching bag on many blogs.

And it points out an important lesson that those of us who work in public relations will say over and over to our clients: STAY ON MESSAGE! And that message should reinforce and enhance the mission of the organization.

Consider this: our mission gives us direction. For example, if we’re a charity that reaches out the homeless, our mission statement will steer us and keep us on track; we won’t be spending time and energy writing letters to government officials about the traffic camera in the intersection. (Unless of course your Executive Director just got a ticket for running through a red light!)

From our mission statement, we develop key messages. And when we talk about our organization, respond to questions, do our fundraising, speak to an issue or confront a problem, we always want to emphasize those crucial messages. That’s what PR folks mean when they SCREAM about staying on message.

And this is where I think PETA got off track. (Again, this is coming from a dispassionate, third-party observer who has no stake in the outcome. I seriously doubt PETA will be contracting for my services...especially after this tirade) Bugs are not the PETA message! The PETA mission is animals, so their message should be consistent with that mission. Insects…well, perhaps they need they need their own advocacy group. (Going on record now: I won’t be joining that one either.)

One comment on a blog observes that at least the incident got PETA some attention. But is that the goal here? Too often in PR, we see the desire to get publicity at any cost—the P.T. Barnum school of thought. (He is credited with many staged events and hoaxes known as publicity stunts, all designed to generate interest and fill the seats) This was more like a drive-by potshot just to get noticed. Or, as I call it: Fly-by PR. It doesn't enhance the organization or build credibility for the mission. Better to stay quiet and choose a fight more closely associated with the stated goals of the organization. That way, we look like educated, concerned experts.

To this observer, the fly got swatted, but PETA took the hit.
PR Lesson: Stay on message.

Get out, and take your PR with you!

I read that in the aftermath of the riots in Los Angeles—following the Rodney King trial—in spite of all the wide-spread destruction, arson and looting, none of the local McDonald’s restaurants were touched. When asked about it, their spokesperson pointed to the years of community relations efforts by the company.

There’s a valuable lesson there. When a time of crisis comes, it’s too late to take an ad in the newspaper (“Please Don’t Burn Down Our Building”) and there’s not enough time to put together a marketing brochure (“Ten Reasons NOT to Burn Down Our Building”).

One of the most vital parts of a proactive PR program (Remember, that’s part of our definition of PR) involves community relations, which is simply practicing good “relations” where you live. The goal is to be perceived as an active, interested and invested member of the community. On a practical level, it’s making and keeping friends in the neighborhood where you do business or provide services. (That’s the whole relationship aspect of our definition again!)

I’ve taught PR workshops to small business owners all over the country and I believe most companies have a conscience; they see their role as more than just sales. But there seems to be two distinct disconnects between the “good intentions” and actual involvement. The first is the standard: wanting to do good but never actually doing anything. (As we know, that’s the classic paving material to you-know-where!)

Second, there’s the gap between doing the good works, but never actually telling anyone about it. What is your company/organization doing that others might not know about? Are there employees on your team who run marathons for worthy causes? Does you company routinely host blood drives, build homes for the needy, collect toys for the underprivileged? These are the kinds of activities that can boost your image and reputation with your community and with your neighbors. Are you publicizing these good deeds? Don’t forget, the primary function of public relations is communication; nothing is accomplished by wishing, telepathy or ESP.

Do your homework, then do your part

If your company is not doing something, you should think about getting involved quickly. Beyond the “four walls” of your business, there’s a world that could use your help. What are the needs of your community? If you don’t know, find out. Charities are often looking for volunteers or even board members. Consider becoming an event sponsor for a local fundraiser. What about a food drive at work? You might be too busy to coach a little league team, but could your company sponsor one of the teams?

Community service is like a bank account: you make regular deposits and it grows. The balance is goodwill from those in the community where you live—which could be locally, nationally or world-wide. Unfortunately, you never know when something bad might happen—a disgruntled employee talks to the media, one of your products is found to be defective, accusations of financial impropriety surface—and you will need to draw on that “goodwill” account. Your reputation can sustain a hit if you’ve built it over time by making regular and consistent deposits of good, supportive community involvement.

Community service or Self Serving?

When you do good, it’s acceptable to let others know. (As a PR professional, I would advice that it’s mandatory.) While you don’t want to appear to be “tooting your own horn,” at the same time, if you don’t talk about it, how will people know? Your community involvement can serve as an example for others to get involved as well. This can be done using news releases, but should also include your company Web site. Let your customers (and any other interested party) know that there’s more to you than just “business as usual.”



Some might see community relations as a diversion to business. (“It takes time away from the office, when I could be selling.” ) But be assured: the time you give will enhance your business/organization, improve your reputation and build loyalty in your employees, who will feel they are doing something good. In the end, it might even change a little part of your world. Is it possible to put a price on that? (Ask McDonald’s after the L.A. fires!)

Communication Takes Two…and then some!

One of the funniest movies ever made (IMHO) is Neil Simon’s Murder by Death. Having grown up watching all the old detective movies (Charlie Chan, Agatha Christie, The Thin Man), this parody was spot on and hysterical.

There’s a scene in the movie where a blind butler (Alec Guinness) is interviewing a deaf cook (Nancy Walker). The deaf cook is holding up a letter in front of the blind man’s face, informing him that’s she deaf. Of course, he doesn’t “see” it and continues with his verbal instructions of the required duties. (Maybe it’s one of those “you had to be there” things, but it cracks me up every time I watch the movie) But here's the lesson: basically, we see lots of activity and hear lots of words, but in reality, not much communication actually takes place.

I think many times we have a similar problem in our offices. Someone is talking in the meeting, but not everyone is hearing (Many aren’t even listening). The boss sent a memo, but not much changed (Uh, the spam filter must have deleted it before I could read it).

What happened?

Communication is the exchange of thoughts, messages or information. Each of us uses a wide variety of communication in our everyday lives. We talk about the weather, football games or the latest winner on last night’s reality show. We respond to those who want to know something from us and ask questions to request the information we need from others. We answer the phone, type e-mails, write proposals, make sales calls, ask for orders and honor promises. We text our friends and update our profile on Facebook. We Twitter and (of course), we update our blog(s). Lots of communication. And aside from talking to ourselves (that’s a subject for a different website), our communication involves other people.

For most of us, the majority of our communication is the informal, casual kind of everyday conversation. And our manner (or style) of communication will vary, depending on the situation, circumstance, location and audience.

Examples: Our conversation at a singles’ bar is not the same as it would be at a family reunion. We will speak at a sales meeting differently from the way we would at a baseball game. Speaking to friends at school sounds different than talking to people at a funeral. The information we share on Facebook will (should!) depend on who’s reading and our privacy settings.

* The channels of communications are many: voice, telephone, Internet, etc.

* The methods are varied: spoken, written, electronic, art, music, etc.

* The style are distinct: casual, formal, conversational, instructional

But the question presented in Murder by Death still echoes: With all the words and activity, is there actual communication going on?

One of the primary problem with most of what we call “communication” is not with the style we use or the methods we employ, but with the outcome we receive (or expect). This is an essential lesson for businesses and business leaders. Many times, the attitude in business is:

=> I said it, so we communicated. (or I sent an email, so we communicated)

=> A press release was sent, so the media will come

=> We had a training class, so they learned.

Sorry, not always the case. (cf: Blind Butler // Deaf Cook senario) Communication (even in business) is not about the number of memos sent from HR. It involves more than the PowerPoint presentation at the staff meeting, even when that presentation comes from the CEO.

Some people naively assume the only thing required to communicate is me talking and you hearing. (Or me writing and you reading) The problem: it confuses talking (or writing) with communicating and mistakes hearing for listening. It also fails to recognize that hearing (or reading) is certainly not the same as understanding, which is one of the primary goals of communication.

The act of talking is simple, but the art of communication is not.